total hypocrisy

Tue, 07 Oct 2008 04:50:31 GMT

Oh, hi. I never post to this (as far as you know.)

LiveJournal is about posting the results of stupid quizzes people send to you, right? LET'S ROLL.

Free personality analysis from ColorQuiz.com.

Generated on Mon Oct 6 21:46:46 2008.

Your Existing Situation

Having difficulty making progress and unwilling to put forth further effort. Seeking more comfortable conditions where he can avoid anything disturbing.

Your Stress Sources

Suppresses his innate enthusiasm and imaginative nature, for fear that he might be carried away by it only to find himself pursuing some will-o'-the-wisp. Feels he has been misled and abused and has withdrawn to hold himself cautiously aloof from others. Keeps a careful and critical watch to see whether motives towards him are sincere--a watchfulness which easily develops into suspicion and distrust.

Your Restrained Characteristics

Your Desired Objective

Needs a peaceful environment. Wants release from stress, and freedom from conflicts or disagreement. Takes pains to control the situation and its problems by proceeding cautiously. Has sensitivity of feeling and a fine eye for detail.

Your Actual Problem

Disappointment at the non-fulfillment of his hopes and the fear that to formulate fresh goals will only lead to further setbacks have resulted in considerable anxiety. He is trying to escape from this into a peaceful and harmonious relationship, protecting him from dissatisfaction and lack of appreciation.

Your Actual Problem #2

Weee...

Sat, 09 Jun 2007 21:33:21 GMT

My DreamHost account was compromised, along with something like 3500 others.

So some of my sites index.html files had been modified to serve invisible SPAM for SEO purposes, apparently.

DreamHost, instead of just fixing it, sent me an email telling me to check my account, check the index.html files (which were full of spam now) and change my passwords. Which I did.

But just now I checked and they were hacked *again* - this time with different SEO shit at the bottom of my pages.

So despite having done the stupid thing of paying DreamHost for a year and moving all my domains there, I assume it's time to pack up again and move servers. Anyone particularly enamored with their hosting service?

Tue, 30 Jan 2007 07:16:07 GMT

Any of you slackers who are reading this stupid LiveJournal crap and don't read trenchant.org should get off your lazy LiveJournal asses and buy Peel's self-titled debut album.

And you know, calling it an album doesn't even really do it justice?

This is Dakota Smith's Rushmore.

This is like if Mozart and Jonathan Richman had had a baby together and made that baby play Zelda for 20 years and then learn bass guitar.

This is musical experience that kicks so much ass, you'll probably go deaf, but not mind because you have heard all there is to hear.

This is a musical achievement beyond any others... well at least any others I have personally written a check with the memo "down the toilet" for.

And if that doesn't convince you, think about my needs. I am the Executive Producer on this album. Do you want me to fail?

No. No you don't. Or maybe you do.

BUY THIS ALBUM AND INHALE IT WITH YOUR BRAIN.

Thu, 13 Jul 2006 04:30:10 GMT

adammathes.vox.com

Whatever that means.

10 millionth reason to hate LiveJournal.

Sun, 23 Apr 2006 07:26:48 GMT

If you're looking at an entry on LiveJournal, and click the next entry button, it doesn't always show you the next entry.

If the next entry is set to private, friends only, or "all friends but adam" protected, you get a wonderful "Error You are not authorized to view this protected entry." page instead.

This is bad for a number of reasons:

1. It's not really an error at all, it's just asshole permissions working as intended.

2. It lets me, the user know that there are entries in existence that I can't read. This is the sort of bug that's important to pay attention in social software. I don't want to know that you're writing things marked as private or "all friends but adam," my blood pressure is high enough as it is.

3. The "error" page doesn't have forward and back arrows, so you can't continue to browse the entries, it's just a deadend.

4. This situation is wholly preventable on the server side since the next and previous buttons hit a server side script to direct to the next entry (it's not as though it's a static link on the page.) It should just smartly figure out the next *viewable* entry for the user, rather than doing something braindead like take the next sequential entry regardless of viewability.

How much did SixApart pay for this again?

And yes, as always, I'm talking about you.

Tue, 13 Dec 2005 06:41:29 GMT

All my websites have exploded and are gone for a while.

I feel a great emptiness.

PS - FEELING GREAT EMPTINESS IS SO LIVEJOURNAL!!!

my web site is down

Tue, 28 Dec 2004 07:03:18 GMT

So trenchant dot org is gone.

FOREVER

Or probably just until someone figures out why the hell Apache won't start on tantra. Someone who isn't me.

I'm really sort of upset since I actually had an entry written that was supposed to be published Monday. It's like, I finally write something, and the server explodes, and I'm left with the option of writing my paragraphs of poop here, with that god-awful goat staring back at me, and just feeling dirty because I'm posting on LiveJournal. I should really be posting everything to my SpicePlay account, which is still active, surprisingly. (Thanks Josh!) Alt-porn is somehow less sleazy than LiveJournal, in my mind.

Not really.

So, this is a journal, right? Would you like to hear about what I had for lunch today? Lox and bagels.

Would you like to hear about what I had for dinner today? Corned beef sandwich.

I am totally Jewey.

How about personal details of friends of mine that you don't know and don't care about? Dan got engaged last week.

Man, this journal stuff TOTALLY RULZ.

i don't do memes, but I SUPPORT NATALIE

Fri, 17 Dec 2004 20:43:40 GMT

Here's an awesome survey Natalie made up for me to do!

1. What color is your toothbrush?
Blue. Apparently I am still encumbered by color-gender-boundaries.

2. Boy elephant or girl elephant?
I don't do Republican roleplaying. (Anymore.)

3. Do you use dryer sheets?
YES! They make things softer... when they come out of the dryer!

4. What's your favorite dinosaur?
Ichthyosaurus.

5. Do you sing karaoke?
Once, in 1993, when I was on a biking trip in Cape Cod. I think this only further proves that my parents sending me off to the east coast to live off of my bicycle for three weeks caused serious lapses in judgment and permanent damage. Also, can you believe I actually lived off only the things I carried on two saddle bags for three weeks? And I actually biked places?

6. What's your favorite sea animal?
Ichthyosaurus. SEE? I WAS THINKING AHEAD!

7. Dark, milk, or white chocolate?
Milk.

8. What about vanilla?
I find vanilla extract is quite useful as an ingredient -- but only real vanialla extract. The fake stuff is just like putting in cheap vanilla-smelling rubbing alcohol.

9. When you have a spare paperclip do you bend it out of shape?
Oh man, remember on the old Macintosh computers that wouldn't eject disks, how you'd have to bend a paperclip and press the HIDDEN BUTTON thing to get the disk out? That was so annoying.

10. Did you hear the one about the gorilla and the masking tape?
I thought it was a monkey.

11. What kind of computer do you use?
Ones with screens that are too large. My Dell desktop has a 19 inch flat panel, my old skool original Titanium Powerbook was the first to have the 15.4 inch widescreen, and my cheapo Toshiba notebook also has a 15inch screen. This is important because since I've been staring at computer screens nonstop since I was six, my vision is really bad.

12. Do you have a mouse with a scroll button?
Yes, but I find it's really most useful with first person shooters.

13. Write a 9-word sentence about yourself:
When I was younger, I drank too much coffee.

order of operations

Thu, 22 Jul 2004 03:33:29 GMT

Levels of hatred of non-trenchant.org emergency update services (from most hated to least hated)

1. this stupid livejournal

2. this stupid blogspot

3. this totally awesome diaryland!!

I should be studying.

trenchant is broken

Tue, 20 Jul 2004 17:53:29 GMT

Man, I wrote this TOTALLY AWESOME daily entry for today but it didn't show up because tantra (Ben's server where trenchant.org lives) is undergoing much overdo upgrades.

AND

......VERY IMPORTANT NEWS THAT WOULD HAVE POSTED TO DISCUSS IF DISCUSS STILL WORKED......

I just got emailed by a textbook company that wants to use this picture of Dakota in a statistics textbook. How fucking awesome is that?

TOO AWESOME FOR LIVEJOURNAL, FUCKERS.

human computer interinsanity

Mon, 31 May 2004 06:36:30 GMT

Hello, and welcome again to another episode of "I fucking hate Livejournal." I'll be your host, Adam "Why the Fuck Am I Even Writing This" Mathes.

At first, my question was what kind of braindead idiot would design and implement the top navigation bar like the one used on Livejournal.

In case you haven't noticed, it's user hostile. Let's say you move your mouse over to "Journal" and then a sub-navigation bar appears under it. Then let's say you decide to click "Friends." So you, as a normal, functional human being using a mouse in the most natural way, move your mouse towards "Friends."

But then that sub-navigation bar is GONE.

It's gone because since you are a human being, and not a robot, you moved your mouse towards Friends in a diagonal, the shortest path. But since this is a horribly designed navigation tool, "Journal" is not selected anymore, since your mouse moved over some of the other top level navigation elements. Just TRY and select options with that menu.

Oh sure, you could, if you move your mouse vertically ONLY, then horizontally ONLY, but you won't do that naturally, because you're a human. Not only are you a human, but you are a human who has likely been using computers for a few years, and has built up expectations about how to use a graphical user interface.

This thing ignores so many basic tenets of HCI that I decided my question was not so much what kind of braindead idiot would design it, but what sort of antisocial asshole could hate users of a web site so much, they would design it.

Eventually I realized the answer: a fat one.

Either that, or it was designed by robots. Robots that hate people. Or stupid robots.

Or people who have not ever bothered to use a computer in the past 20 years, except to design that thing.

The point is, why the fuck do you people use this thing? Seriously. Stop.

Mon, 05 Apr 2004 06:15:22 GMT

After looking at the nightly generated statistics pages from trenchant.org that I've been ignoring for so long (I don't need a computer to tell me I have no audience, I already know it) I found out something astounding - I think I hate Xanga users more than Livejournal users.

This is based on SCIENCE. Or STATISTICS. Or something that is OBJECTIVE. Or something.

Anyway, there are half a dozen Xanga users that attempt to use images from trenchant.org on their pages. Except that the trenchant.org .htaccess file forbids any non-trenchant.org refererrs for images and gives a 304 error.

But apparently this does not deter them.

I am tempted to redirect the images to something gross, but that seems so... lame. Mostly I think it just shows that Xanga is used by people even dumber and more idiotic than Livejournal. (Maybe.) Basically, now, all you fucking Livejournal users who are helping to ruin the Web by posting here in this weird-fucking-cult-bullshit site instead of ANYWHERE ELSE now have an almost legitimate defense in that "well, at least it's not Xanga."

Tue, 20 Jan 2004 23:47:57 GMT

moblogging still sux waiting for 1st class to start

Wed, 14 Jan 2004 02:51:10 GMT

In new apt. No net only cell ph. fuck moblogs. HI!!

Mon, 12 Jan 2004 23:53:49 GMT

Fuck moblogging

SPIDEY 4EVA

Tue, 16 Dec 2003 18:18:52 GMT

I really wish I was a paid user so I could use the Spider-Man LiveJournal Styles.

Wait. No I don't.

Uber personals

Mon, 15 Dec 2003 16:51:16 GMT

Uber personals has some new features. You can "rate" people - except unlike the happy-sappy bullshit world of Friendster, the person you rate has no option to decline your rating. However, they can make a rebuttal - and both the rating and rebuttal show up on your profile as well as the person you rated. COMEDY AND ADVENTURE ENSUES.

And there's other stuff too.

Tell your friends! (But only if they're hott.)

Mon, 01 Dec 2003 19:19:47 GMT

I am moving to Champaign/Urbana to start graduate school in January. I need housing. That doesn't suck. Please help.

Your pal,
Adam

grammar over gender politics, you stupid fucks

Thu, 23 Oct 2003 16:44:49 GMT

In order to further annoy me, LiveJournal sends out notices whenever someone comments on my posts. Here's an example.

Josh Santangelo (endquote) replied to your LiveJournal post in which you
said:

> So, is foot worship mainstream or something? Did I miss that memo?

[REMOVED THE REST BECAUSE YOU DON'T GET TO READ IT SINCE THIS IS A PUBLIC ENTRY HAHA DON'T YOU WISH YOU WERE ON MY FRIENDS LIST BUT YOU GET TO READ JOSH'S REPLY AREN'T YOU LUCKY!!]

Their reply was:

I just tried, and I think in order to see that, one has to take the sex
quiz as well. And I'm sure as hell not going to have my peccadillos
listed in some random db somewhere. My SSN and checking account number,
sure, but not my stance on foot worship.

Emphasis added. "Their" reply? It should be 'his' or 'her' reply. Or if they are really worred about gender politics, it should be 'the' reply. But not 'their' reply. Because it is not the reply of multiple clone Josh Endquotes. It is the reply of a single Josh Endquote.

Bad grammar in the name of gender neutrality is fucking dumb.

Tue, 27 May 2003 04:05:35 GMT

IMStalking is now running. I think.

You should go and... look at it.

Two things that don't taste great together...

Thu, 22 May 2003 23:47:40 GMT

Look, it's the trenchant livejournal RSS feed! trenchantfeed

RSS + LiveJournal... together. It's sort of like a sausage cake.

Except that I kind of like cake on its own.

Nick made a sausage cake for his friend's birthday yesterday, and everyone was about to eat it, but at the very last second as they were serving it, a crumb dropped and somebody noticed it wasn't a crumb, but a piece of sausage and the joke was up.

And no, I didn't make the TrenchantFeed thingee. I assume Josh did, as he is the only one subscribed to it.

LJ Totally Rocks The House!!!!!

Wed, 13 Nov 2002 04:26:32 GMT

Having a friends-only LiveJournal is TOTALLY AWESOME!!!

I'm going to write all about my SUPER AWESOMELY COOL life. But for FRIENDS ONLY!!

Haha non-friends! You TOTALLY SUCK! And are going to miss out on all of the extremely interesting discussions about my exciting life of drugs, sex, and... sex.

To summarize:

Friends = SEXXX!

Non-friends = nada.